Goals for 2013

#1 Focus on a budget and stick to it
Work on paying off 1 to 2 debt accounts this year. I have already worked on a budget plan for all of 2013 and showed my husband. I think it's something we can strictly stick to as much as possible. Once we get thru a month or two of 2013 we will start picking 1-2 debts to pay more towards in efforts to eliminate those bills in 2013.

#2 Push and make it to Onderland by the end of 2013
That's 8.3 lbs a month, 1.9 lbs a week. I know that is a very agressive goal. I do not plan on doing this unhealthy at all. I plan on putting in the work and eating what I need to in order to get there. The only thing that would derail this goal is if I finally got pregnant, then I won't feel so bad if I miss this hahaha. If I put in the effort and say I did everything I could then what ever # loss happens... is what happens, and I'll be thrilled.

#3 Reignite my passion for scenic photography and oil painting
Spend way to much time watching reruns or TV. Figure this will get me out and about more and really spark my creative side. I can focus on the pictures in order to spark my wanting to oil paint.

#4 Work on the yard
Figure this helps physically and visually. Some know that we have a infestation of Mole/Gophers that we've been trying to get rid of for a year. I think in the spring we will have an exterminator out. Then we will till up the entire back yard and some of the front. I have put some initial thoughts together of what we may do and I think our focus this year is to clean up a much as we can and plant some trees. Next year we want to rip out the deck to rebuild and put a concrete patio... then we'll put sod in the back yard... still working out what we want to do so this one is on here just to say that it'll be a focus.

#5 Get my home in order
Not that I live in squaller... but I have plenty of rooms that are starting to get "Horders" scary. I've decided that anything we can agree to let go of we are going to sale or donate. I have a 4 bedroom home and only allow folks to see the kitchen, living room, and bathroom. I want to be able to leave doors open when guests come over. I want to walk into a room and LOVE IT! First things first, "a place for everything and everything in it's place"

I am sure I will have small goals or "mini" goals throughout the year. But I want to really focus on these 5. I'm not calling them my "resolutions" because I want to actually follow through and not give up on any of these.

Look back at 2012 goals

In Dec last year I made the below 5 goals. I will attempt to explain how I did on them..

#1 Only one meal out a week: This was a great goal but not realistic for our lifestyle. What I did instead was prelook up nutrition facts and made choices that fit within my daily "budget". So fail but not so much fail

#2 I am going to read one book a month: I went strong on this one the first half of the year... then I fell off. First off I'm taking a certification course for work and do a ton of reading for that... second, I've been working out so much I just want to spend my spare time with my hubs.

#3 Keep a up to date account ledger and stick strictly to a premade budget/grocery list: hahahahaha this will be on my 2013. This was an epic fail

#4 Take time for myself: This I didn't fail on. I signed up for Jazzercise 3-4 times a week and continued to do 2 scrapbook clubs a month. Now I feel like I don't have hardly any down time but that's not such a bad thing. Down time = eating junk

#5 Take time off and not lose the time I've earned: I can only carry over 40 hours into the next year... this year I'm not losing time I'm burning my time. I will only be carrying over 36 hours :) so no off time wasted this year. Yay!!

Additional goals: Participate in a 5K (fact I participated in 2 and 2 1 Ks), Gave up soda for good, started in Jan and haven't had any, and log all my food which I do on the myfitnesspal.com website religiously since July.

Stay tuned for my 2013 goals

Full body shots March till Nov

Under construction ETA Dec 1st

Tired of the toying scale

303, 302, 300.5

I can't seem to break the 300 mark. I know I know... I am so close and not to get discouraged now. I count every calorie. Work out. water water water.... I just can't seem to break it. I should be shedding weight like mad.

Some day... some day I will look back at this and laugh at my thoughts. I will not stop I will keep pushing thru.

Accepting and dealing with the cards you are dealt

Lately I have been thinking long and hard about all aspects of my life. I'm doing well with weight loss, I'm in a good marriage, I'm starting to get hope back that possibly someday I'll hold MY child, and Hudson is happy now.

It's true though that you always want more then what you are blessed with. You want a thinner body faster, You want a healthy baby of your own, You want excitment to happen in your life every day, you want a bigger better home, You want your debt to disappear, you want clothes that work with your body, you want you want you want.

How do we overcome the "wants" and be happy with the "what I haves"?

Someday I think that I need to address this addiction to "always wanting more" with a professional. People will tell me, "Just be thankful" or "Just put it out of your mind" or "Your time will come". It honestly feels like I do everything to be good and moral but yet see others rewarded that are bad and S#itheads. It isn't that easy when you have an addictive personality to just not be happy with what you don't have. I've seen addicition all my life as well through those close to me. I know when I need help and I know when to ask for it.

Maybe it's just human nature. Maybe no one is meant to feel "Whole" and that's the challenge god has put before me. I know I don't usually get this deep in thought but today I'm really reflective.

Didn't rule those 2 lbs... but it's ok

So before vacation I didn't lose the 2 lbs I needed to so that I could celebrate being out of the 300's. But you know what, that's ok!

I still went on vacation, had fun running around Disneyland, relaxing at the condo, and eating tons of good food. I didn't feel guilty or ashamed. I tried my best to stay within calorie lines and did a TON of walking so I didn't fret.

I am back... I'm not going to weigh myself until this Saturday so I don't discourage myself at all. I will get in 3-4 Jazzercise classes, I will restock my fridge with good foods, and I will be excited for my next event with id "Night of the Running Dead" this Saturday night!

Onward and upward. I will get out of the 300's and be able to write that post I've been wanting to for years. It will happen!

2.1 lbs... I will rule you... I hope :)

So... I am officially only 2.1 lbs away from being out of the 300's. I want to be out of the 300's by this Saturday since I'll be on vaca in San Diego all next week.

I got a fortune cookie exactally 3 months ago from Oct 6th's date stating in three months you will get exciting news. I have been so hoping that this is true... and since it just so happens it falls on my official weigh in day. I certainly hope for atleast a 299.5 (Since my scale goes in .5's) reading. If it does I will have officially made it out of the 300's and haven't been that light in 6 years or so. I will then celebrate on my vacation and then get prepared for "Night of the Running Dead" when I get back.

Not sure with everything going on this week if I'll be able to Blog again until I get back from Vaca but I'll try... even if it's just to tell you what happens this Saturday.

Changing of Seasons

If you don't know fall is my favorite time of year. The air is a little crisper requiring a blanket or jacket, football, marching band, colors changing, it's ok to wear darker colors. I just love it. With fall also comes "Comfort" food. I am determined this year to make healthier comfort foods.

I am also finding it hard to get my proper water intake. It gets cold thus harder to drink water. Ugh I hope that I can figure it out because I don't want that to hinder my wgt loss.

Good news is I'm only 4.1 lbs away from being out of the 300's! I'm hoping to get out of it prior to going on vacation in 2 weeks.

Marathon Week (not in a good way)

Let me run it down for you:

Monday: Mother in Laws Birthday at Cracker Barrel (Low carb menu :) )
Tuesday: Double Jazzercise classes (Didn't get in enough calories)
Wednesday: Rock Festival (Crap food but stayed within cals)
Thursday: Habitat for Humanity project (Crap food but stayed within cals)
Friday: Rehersal Dinner (For a wedding Duanes in)
Saturday: Lunch with aunts at Cheesecake factory and then the Wedding
Sunday: Nephews Birthday Party

How much more stuff can Sammie pack into her week? Ummmm I don't know and honestly I don't want to find out. So even though I'm keeping with in my calories I've not made the most sodium friendly choices this week. If tomorrow mornings weigh in is that I am the same weight and not more.... I'll be happy!

Is that what I think those are??? Wrist bones!!!

If you haven't figured out I do my weigh ins officially on Saturday mornings now. Mostly because I find if I weigh the morning after a work out I tend to have some retention probably due to muscle repair. So since I generally don't work out friday nights this works out. I weigh myself before I get ready for my work out that morning. but I digress... back to the topic at hand (pun intended)

This week I have noticed that my hands have more definition. When I type I can see muscles and ligaments moving. Kinda sweet!... The other thing I noticed today was as I was shaving my arm hair (I do this so I don't have gross black thick hairs on my arms) that I almost knicked a wrist bone.... where the heck did those come from!!!

So it appears with my weight loss that the most dramatic changes might be from the limbs on in... because my ankles are looking uber skinny too and I'm starting to see some definition in my calves.

Super motivating!

Queen, Princess, Popper

So if you don't know what I mean this is the run down:

Eat like a Queen for breakfast
Eat like a Princess for lunch
Eat like a Popper for dinner

I try to keep that in mind when I plan out my meal selections for the day. Eat your heavy carbs earlier in the day then you have all day to burn them off, enough carbs at Lunch to fuel the rest of the day and light carbs at dinner to finish off your day.

Ofcourse with my blood sugar levels needing to stay level I eat 6 times a day. I make sure that my snack are never larger then a meal... I try to get in the larger meal calories at breakfast or lunch. I try to keep dinner as light as possible when I eat dinner after a evening work out. If it's earlier in the day I try to balance out all three major meals.

So far that has helped me lose 22 lbs in 2 months time. We'll see if it continues to go this way, but I'm seeing more difference in my body and the way I feel then in the scale.

can you say NOTICABLE? sure I knew you could

Yeah, I can tell there's more light coming through on places... and lifting everywhere... I feel good!

Hey, Fat Girl!

Fore warning I about cried when I read this.... I am this "Fat Girl"

(This is a blog entry from flintland.blogspot.com)

Hey, Fat Girl.

Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the
running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy.
You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make
you cringe.

You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops
on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so
much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes
at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You
never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

You are awesome.

If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the
reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is
tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a
brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will
far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face
your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this
physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult
decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take
is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so
slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were
in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is
stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is
possible.

You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and
put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that
the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so
inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people,
know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so
many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health,
“starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from
deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are
relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and
you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe
tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will
not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a
new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

I bow to you.

Now that you've read it... honestly I've always been a very very strong person on the outside. But on the inside I am this girl. It wasn't until I found Jazzercize (thanks Christy!!!) that I truely feel I can hold my head up high, get my sweat on and don't see judgmental eyes. I now see and hear from people that are inspired by me. Those things keep me going and I know I will get there. Honestly, when I lose most of my weight I am going to pay it forward to other woman that struggle... show them there are kind people in the world. Let's stop tearing women down and start building us up!
Love you all! and thank you for reading this. It's very inspiring to know that there are others out there willing to write these things about the fact that "Fat Girls" are trying! "You may not think that walking is not doing anything, but you are still doing laps around those stuck on the couch!"

25% of goal for 2012

Checking in today to say as of Saturdays weigh in I've lost a total of 25 lbs this year. This means I'm officially 25% of my goal accomplished. Note that 20 of those lbs have been lost since early July. I have a feeling I may not hit 100 but I'm pushing to get as close as I can so I have no regrets.

How I feel:
Accomplished, Motivated, Energized, and ready to do more damage!

How I look:
I didn't take measurments until last night but from what I remember I am 2 inches down in my hips, 2 inches or so down in my waist, almost 2 cup sizes smaller. 2 inches down in my band size. And 3 inches down in each arm (where I want to be the most woot). The rest I'm unsure of but now I have a base gauge for the next time I plateau for 2 weeks. I've gone from tight fitting size 30/32 clothes to perfect fit size 26/28 (mostly 26's).

Mini Goals:
#1 To be in a size 24/26 by vacation October 8th
#2 Step it up for 4 Jazzercise classes a week (even if that means 1 1/2 classes on some nights)
#3 Walk EVERY morning on break for 15 mins
#4 Consider doing the free U OF U 5K on Sept 8th
#5 Continue to log every day on MFP (MyFitnessPal.com)

Already accomplished goals:
Signed up for Night of the Running Dead 1K

Playing with numbers

So I was just curious last night if upping my calories by 200 a day would show an impact. Well I'm proud to say my Plateau of 318 is broken. Last night with my clothes on and not fasting I weighed 315.5. My official weigh in is Friday so I'll be excited to see how much of a difference that made.

Last night I also did 1 1/2 Jazzercise classes which is the most I've done to date. I would have done a full 2 but I had to be somewhere. Have to tell you I was sore and tired and HUNGRY MONKEY by the time I got to where I needed to be. When I got home last night I downed a protein shake and some strawberries then an hour later went and passed out on the bed. Haven't been that tired from a work out in a LOOOOOONG time. I'll have to do that again sometime.

So what I learned: If my body isn't getting enough it will stay static on the scale, if my body is getting too much it will raise my wgt on the scale, if my body is getting just enough I will lose on the scale. I need to stop thinking that eating more will hurt me especially if those are the right things to eat.

I can't wait to go into the doctor again maybe next month to get my H1C tested again to see if my blood sugars have dropped. I also can't wait to see if my blood pressure is decreasing, it's hard to find a blood pressure station at a store that has an arm sleave big enough I swear they are all built for children.

Plateau should be a 4 letter word

ARRRRGGGGHHHH. So thrid weigh in in a row I'm at 318... no change

Last week I added more protein into my diet... no change...

I am 10 days into August and only 20 more to lose my ten lb goal. I just want to cry right now.

I know I need to just push through and keep counting my calories. I have been between 1400-1600 so I'm thinking of boosting to 1700-1800 and see if my body is in starvation mode. Could totally be why.

I have been pushing it harder at class but my emotional rollacoster lately has been killing me. I haven't been eating ANYTHING out of what I plan to eat. Why does this have to be so hard for me. I'm over 300 lbs and the weight should be falling off!

.5 lbs.... ehhh plateau anyone?

So on friday I weighed in only .5 lbs less then the week prior. That does bring my total for July to 16 lb loss. I decided not to do my usual "give up" because one week I stayed the same. I celebrated the fact that I was able to clear out 3 bags of "fat" clothes out of my closet to donate. I was able to fit into a whole other wardrobe that have been in boxes for 2-3 years. I accomplished more weightloss in one month then most do in a year (trust me because last year I only lost 10 the whole year).

It's all thanks to my BP meds and myfitnesspal.com

I count EVERY single calorie that goes in my mouth and all my "Additional" activity such as Jazzercise or cleaning. My calories are based on my seditary work lifestyle.

Lets see what August can bring. I want to try to lose 10 lbs a month if I can. So this week I upped my protein and down my carb % so let's see!

Keeping Motivated

First off I changed my ticker to have the full years worth of weight loss not just since my start to Jazzercise. Let's break this down. In the last 3 weeks I have lost 15.5 lbs so 5.5 lbs were my loss from Jan-June... wah wah wahhhhhhhh
But as you can see I believe I've finally found the right combination of fuel in and work out= weight loss. This also has helped being on meds for high BP. I've really been focused on not only Calorie and Fat intake... but Protein, Carbs, Sodium and sugars. I try to have 0 "white" sugars in any given day if I can help it. Most of my sugar content come from natural food sources.

My goal of losing 100 lbs this year is not for NOT. I will get close to that # as I am fully determined to do so. I want new cute outfits for the holidays! I want a cute family picture this year to send in my Christmas cards. I don't want this feeling of accomplishment and pride to go away. So I will keep powering on. Finding new ways to make the foods I love and tracking every calorie that hits my lips!

Finding the Key

Well aparently where you least expect it... you find light in the mist of bad news. If you read my last post "The Trifecta" you learned that just 2 weeks ago I was diagnosed with high BP, Prediabetes, and elevated Cholesterol.

Since July 5th I have been using myfitnesspal.com to track every calorie I stick in my mouth. There is such a great community on there I encourage everyone now to join and it's free. I've also really re-evaluated how I cook, eat, and live. In making small changes like wheat wraps instead of bread for sandwhiches, Actually eating breakfast EVERY day not just once in a while, taking my meds for high blood pressure, and adding a few esscential supliments to my diet. I have managed to lose 12 lbs in just 2 weeks. This is amazing!

So I am thinking that maybe for years I should have been pushing for the answers I've been desperatly looking for even if they were bad. Because until I know what the issue is I can't do anything that will change my situation.

I look like I'm melting in my clothes that are now too big but I refuse to go shopping until they fall off my butt with out a belt. I will get to where I want to be and maybe just maybe complete my family in the near future... but #1 is me!

The Trifecta

Well, I've been debating blogging about this. I do feel however getting it out there in writing makes me more accountable for my actions.

As everyone knows I've been trying to have a baby for 3 years now. It's been a long difficult road.. Well I've been working with a new OB and he's run some follow up tests from last year as a follow up. My family has a history of high BP... well I guess it's finally catching up with me because mine has been on the rise for the last 2 years. So I am now on pregnancy safe (In case I do get pregnant ever) BP meds.

The next issue is I am at the prediabetic level. I had a feeling even cutting out soda and reducing candy wouldn't help since last year... I was really hoping it would. So I'm logging my calories on myfitnesspal app and .com. I'm able to add in columns such as sodium and sugars. Problem now is understanding how much sugars I can have in a day because pretty much per this tracker if I have 2 apples I'm over.

The last serious issue is elevated Cholesterol. Since all meds for this is not pregnancy friendly I have to control this via diet.

Good news is I've been doing Jazzercise 3-4 times a week since March and am feeling so much stronger. I have been logging my meals and such for a week and making myself accountable and have lost 6.5 lbs since last week. That means I'm in the 320's again. Per myfitnesspal if I keep up the path I'm on I should be possibly out of the 300's in mid to late fall... can't wait for that day!

"All Talk"

So last week I injured my back and really have hardly been able to move except the last 2 days. I’m going to try to get to a Jazzercise class tonight but I know I’ll have to watch it as I’m still sore and don’t want to risk further injury.

I say I’m “All Talk” because it seems like I know what I’m saying, I know what I need to do, yet, I don’t do it. I pick up that candy, I pick up that full sugary lemonade, and I don’t have self control. It’s funny when it had to do with a religious obligation like Lent I was able to give up that stuff for 40 days and then ofcourse easter rolled around and I thought “Hey you can have one peep, just calm down on it” yeah one turns into chocolate and so on. I honestly can NOT trust myself with this. When I make up my mind to not eat another stitch of candy I can do it… I’ve done it 2 years in a row for lent… but why does it feel like I’m mourning a loss with the thought of giving it up almost completely?

An addict has to give up what they are addicted to. Problem is I’m addicted to food and you HAVE to have food to survive. I know what I should be eating, how often, etc…. so why can’t I stop myself from grabbing a burger once a week or a pizza… argh

Excuses have been my life and when I set out on this year I said it was the year of change. Maybe I need to look into hyptnotisim as a means of changing

On believing in myself

Everyone says I should. I know I should and do on so many occations but when it comes to my weight not so much.

I didn't get fat because I eat too much. I didn't get fat because I sit on the couch and never do anything.

I got fat because my chemicals are imbalanced... I got fat because in High School I was bulimic and never really learned how to eat better so I would binge and purge thus causing permenant scars inside and out... I got fat because I stopped caring about myself and only thought of others for over a decade... I got fat by not eating meals and then getting so starving that when I did eat my body turned it into fat.

I know what my problem is, now I need to believe that I can change it completely. Just writing this stuff especially admitting virally that I was bulimic feels like a large wgt off my sholders. Now what do I do?

I've started Journaling my food intake again using buddyslim.com
I will continue to Jazzercise 3-4 times a week
I will look in the mirror and tell myself I am worth the effort
I will STOP asking why the scale won't move
I will figure out my body's healthy puzzle
I will Love myself!

YTD: 1 Lb a month

So if you can see my tracker I've lost about a lb a month. Ouch. I keep going up and down and up and down. On the bright side IT'S A LOSS overall!

So there is a challenge with Jazzercise starting today. If me and a partner attend 60 days between now and July 31st we will earn Jazzercise tanks. Who doesn't like a trophy for free!! well sweat and exhaustion... But so worth it!

I am upping my classes from 3 to 4 a week starting Monday. I am also making small changes to my diet in order to #1 ensure I EAT BREAKFAST ( bad sammie) and also eat lighter more nutrient meals later in the day. With it being summer that won't be hard because all I want to eat is cold foods, fruits, and veggies. Last weekend I ate half a watermelon myself. Took me 3 days but yeah :P

I really want to lose at least 10 lbs this month. Which I do realize is twice what I've lost this year. I'm going to make it a daily mission to get there... starting with limiting candy to once a week and popcorn to once a week... can I do it.. Hellz yes!

On believing what my Husband tells me.... finally!

So, for a few weeks now my Husband has been telling me he can already see changes in my body, to not worry about what the scale says, so on and so forth. Do I beleive him... No, ofcourse I don't. I've been conditioned since I was little to only care about what the scale says. If the scale isn't going down then I'm not doing good thus I suck! Well... that thinking needs to change and change for good.

One of my favorate instructors told me she's already seeing me slim in... then my sister in law says it... then my own family. Guess what... it took all those people to convince me what my husbands been saying is true. That is sad that it took that many people. But I admit it and Duane, here it is in writing "You Were Right, and Thank You for Noticing!"

So today I looked in the loooong mirror at work. The one I'm always dreading, and I notice that my clothes are hanging... not struggling to breathe... on my body. So even though the scale has only gone down a few lbs the change is noticable and happening.

Nothing has stopped me from working out 3 plus times a week. I will beat my inner demons and gosh darn it, I look damn good at any size.

Peace out!

Final countdown to Race for the Cure

This Saturday morning I will be doing the walk for the Race for the Cure in Salt Lake City. I've been signed up for 4 months now so this feels like it's been a loooooong time coming :). In preperation for this day I am going to find everything pink I can from Ribbon for my hair down to shoe laces. I am also going to get in three work outs with Jazzercise during the week since I'll be missing Saturday due to this race.

So pretty busy week overall! I'm just excited to be doing this for such a good cause and that I was able to wrangle up team mates and donations!

I'm sure I'll be posting pics this weekend, wish us luck! Go Team ROCKY ROLLERS!

Feeling Stronger each day

So I'm tired of the scale telling me if I am or am not making progress. The other day I stepped on and about flew off the handle that I was 333 when just a few days prior I was 326.5.... ummm not! My pants are fitting very loose in the legs and I'm starting to see changes in my arms.

I've been on this roller coaster for many years and I know that at first when you start a work out regimine and aren't on a 100% clean diet you tend to gain muscle and the scale doesn't drop or drop as fast.. My hubby reminded me that weighing every day only played into that emotional roller coaster and he's right. I should just focus on what I can control and only weigh my self once a month like I told myself I was going to do.

So after vacation I have the 5K for race for the cure. I plan to spend the time after vacation to refocus my meal plan. Focus on quick and easy things I can grab and go that stay inline with eating right (AND ENOUGH!). I think I have the work out part down and am going 3-4 days a week. I know the food part really is the hardest part. I am so proud of my Husband being down 10 lbs since Jan 1st. I'm down 6 which isn't too shabby... but I have a long way to go and damn it I want to fit into that cute wardrobe hanging in my closet waiting for me :(

I can do this!

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

-Christina Aguilera

Addicted to Jazzercise

So the first week I went three nights in a row and slightly pulled my knee. Now I've found that if I put a day or two in between I can rock it. I still feel on the days that I'm not working out the urge to want to go. I'm calling this my new addiction! I feel great after working out. Now I need to get my mind into eating properly for the amount I'm exerting so the weight will fly off. I know how to do this as I've done it before with my friend who is a personal trainer. Just need to make my menu, stick to my list at the store and eat on time.

Right now though I'm focusing on getting my butt to class 3 days a week and eating better. After vacation at the end of this month I will then get on a meal plan 5-6 days out of the week... but right now I'm focusing on working out and my road to vacation!!! because rest is just as important.

I highly recommend the Jazzercise work out. There are all levels and it's very encouraging atmosphere. Love those ladies!!!

My first 5K results

Well I did it! I completed my first 5 K. I did so in 1 hour 1 min and 35.5 seconds.
Let me tell you it wasn't as easy as I thought it was going to be. For one I'm carrying over 200lbs of extra person on me, My left foot and calf went numb half way through and stayed numb until about 5 yards from the finish, I was the 4th last people to finish.... but you know what? I did it, I didn't give up, and I kept telling myself to believe I could finish. Whether it took me 3 hours or 1 damn it I was going to finish what I set out to do. I feel like a different person now. I feel like I want to set more goals to try to accomplish...

First thing is first. Jazzercise, lose weight and set my sites for my next 5 K which is May 12th. I want to be able to not be in pain for days after and want to have that same sense of accomplishment.

If I can do this at 330 lbs... what's your excuse?

Taking action...

So, I went to a free Jazzercise class last night. At first I thought I wasn't going to make it through but I forced myself to stick it out. You know what? I ended up looooving it and I was able to do most of the moves. The Instructor Angie was amazing! She was motivating us to sing along and yell on command.. kept me very engaged. After class I decided to go ahead and sign up for a year. I've been needing a class which pushes me to work harder and not just slightly go through the motions at home. I love the GIRL POWER feel to the place and the people were so nice. I also love that my friend Christy introduced me to this and now I have a great work out partner!

In little over a day I have my first 5K ever!!!! The trail seems pretty flat and easy. I'm excited to be doing this not only to prove to myself that I can do this but helping out a great cause. Yes, Ladies and gentleman... I maybe turning into one of "those" people, but hey, my soul feels great right now.

I'm sure i'll be posting pics of before, during, and after the event on a blog later this weekend. So Excited!!!!

How crazy am I?

Not only am I doing a 5K in March but now I've started a team for the Susan G Komen Cancer walk/run on May 12th. My goal was to complete a 5K this year and now I've committed to 2. I actually feel my soul is more at peace with this. It's not a feeling I've had in a long time.

My Mother passed away on Mother's day 1994. I was only 14 years old when she passed. It's hard every year around that time, but am so blessed at the support I have from my family members including my Step Mother Norine, who pretty much took a broken home and made it whole again. So breast cancer awareness is something I'm an advocate of. It's truly my honor to walk in the memory of my mother and inspire others to either join with me or donate for the cure.

Click below to join my team or donate to the cause
http://www.info-komen.org/site/TR/RacefortheCure/General?px=12182360&pg=personal&fr_id=2479

I feel a sense of pride that I'm getting up and moving and commiting to these things.

Jan 2012 wrap up

Well not what I wanted to lose but a loss is a loss. In January I managed to get through the holidays, get a promotion at work, take on extra work until a replacement is hired for my current position, and on top of that... my birthday on the 23rd which is always a weekend long event.

I'd say with all of that going on and still at a 3 lb loss for the month... I'LL TAKE IT!

Now come on nice weather! I've signed up for a 5K (purpleday5K.com) for March 24th. This means I need to start training for this. This will be my first 5K ever. Yes, I am walking but as a great motivational push my cousin Jen posted to me... It doesn't matter how fast you run you are still doing laps around those on the couch. I've decided to start a scrapbook for just all my events I participate in and maybe someday when I am blessed with a child they will be proud that their momma didn't just lay down and die.

Have YOU given up yet?

There are statistics that say over 50-60% of you have already given up on your resolutions. Question is.... why?

Have you not gotten your materials or ideas organized on how to succeed?
Have you decided that it's just too hard to maintain?
Have you just plain given up?

If you answered YES to any of those items well you are human, but you are allowing excuses to get in your way. No one has 100% on days 100% of the time. The point is you have to allow yourself to forgive and move on. It's easier to continually put yourself down or make yourself feel bad for not doing something. Find the time for you... Find the energy for you.



I've made some pretty aggressive goals to lose 100 lbs this year. I wanted to try and lose close to 10 lbs a month. Knowing that some months I'll ROCK IT!!! some I'll fall a little short. I'm not going to beat myself over it to the point that I don't continue to try. A loss is a loss and as long as I keep going down even if it's a lb at a time/week it's a loss. Eventually I'll see the results I desire and I believe this year of TRANSFORMATIONS will happen as long as I want it bad enough.



Hang in there my fellow weight loss friends. If you need motivation or a pep talk just let me know!

This weeks focus: Affirmation

This week not only am I going to continue my push for hydration but I'm going to start telling myself a positive image affirmation in the mirror each day this week.

Not only do we need to change our outer self but also our inner self. I do believe there are scars that we bury deep down that also cause our bad habits or our ease to give up on our goals. Until you face the skeletons in your closet will you begin to heal and love yourself.

I believe I have many thing that I need to just clear out and open up to myself about and let them go. Forgive not only others but myself for those things. I am in hopes that affirmations will assist me in doing so this week. I've also pondered the thought of writing down those things into a notebook and then burning the pages one by one setting them free.

This weeks focus: Hydration

Each week I'm going to focus on a new thing that will help in my weight loss journey.
First things first.... HYDRATION!

It's said that you should drink .5 OZ for every lb you weigh each day. I weighed in Monday at 333.4 X .5= 166.7 oz of water... Holy moley! That's a lot of water batman!

What I'm going to do is try and drink more then I did the day before and get me up to that level. I don't want to drown myself or get myself in a place where I have to run to the bathroom every few mins (especially because I'm on long calls at work and just can't get up for an hour or 2). So today's goal is to drink 3 of my 20 oz bottles before I leave work. That's 60 oz. Then I'm going to try and drink another 40 oz before 8 PM but need to stop there or I'll be up all night. Good start I think. Then tomorrow I'll add 20 oz more then 20 oz more the next day and so on.

I'm hoping by the weekend I'll be up to where I need to be at to maintain Hydration. Then I can pick something else to focus on next week. Stay tuned.